White House evacuated

Washington, D.C. - The White House was evacuated shortly after 11am EST today. The alarm was raised soon after secret service agents heard screaming in the visitors annexe of White House, where it is believed third grade students from a Baltimore Elementary School were visiting on a special tour.

Warning: this story contains some disturbing images.

"We sounded the panic button when we heard screaming," staffer Eva Bjorn told press on the White House lawn. Witnesses claim that the screams prompted a general evacuation.

"As far as we can make out, the children were entering the hall just as Ms Rice was leaving. We know that Condoleeza smiled at the children - and they reacted in panic. We don't have any other details at this time."

It is believed that the event is the first time Miss Rice has smiled in several decades.


"It was awful," bystanders told paramedics. "The screaming of the children was just awful..."

Several of the students from the Wilston Elementary School near Baltimore are believed to be being treated for shock.

"At first we thought it was A-rabs," bystanders told press, while police cordoned off a twelve mile perimeter around the White House. "We're just glad the president is out of harm's way."

"We can't account for what happened but we are assured that no harm was intended by Ms Rice. Condoleeza may be terrifying to small children, but she's not dangerous," joked one White House insider on the condition of anonymity. "Unless you're an Iraqi child, in which case all bets are off."

Meanwhile, the president is safe and well at his ranch near Crawford, Texas, according to officials where, it is believed, he is in a three-day closed session discussion of new proposals to provide tax-cuts for golfers.