President Bush has unequivocally denied that he likes the French. The denials came after a major Washington newspaper reported that Bush was a secret Francophile. The newspaper said that their source was from within the White House, but wished to remain anonymous.

According to the source, the president was extremely fond of French food, often chooses French wine over domestic brands, and even watches French movies as long as they have been dubbed into English (he is not fond of subtitles). "He likes them," the unnamed source was quoted as saying, "He thinks they're almost as good as Hollywood movies. He even one day snuck into an art house theatre in Washington ensconced in a raincoat with a hat pulled over his face, just to see Gerard Depardieu."

"This is nothing but a dirty tricks campaign by our opponents," said White House spokesperson Marlene Clarke. The Democrats are trying to get even over the Monica Lewinsky case."

However, a senior sociologist at Harvard has stated that the accusations may have some basis in fact. "It's not uncommon when at college, particularly at Yale," said Professor Arthur Frinschmann, "For young men to pick up unwholesome habits. Some never kick their dependency on drugs or alcohol. Bush got over his problems in that area, but perhaps he's still got a penchant for things French."